My Final Stand

Never mind all that crap. It turned out okay in the end. Well. I ended up being really upset, cause I didn't know what was going on, and Brittany asked me what was wrong. I didn't want to say but she kept asking, and eventually I decided that it might be better to tell somebody. So I told her everything. And when I got to the part about how scared I was I actually couldn't bring myself to say it. Then Tina was walking past and she saw me crying and said what was wrong, so I ended up telling her too. Then just when I was feeling well and truly depressed, my phone rang. I have NEVER been happier to hear that sound. It was like, everything I loved, everything I lived for and believed in, had been taken away - and then suddenly given back. It was the biggest relief ever. I never want to have to feel that way again, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Not even someone that I wished was dead. No one should have to feel something like what I felt yesterday. But everythings fine now. I'm not going down that road. But if James doesn't get better soon, and if the worst were to happen, well, I might. Probably would. But as long as I still have him I'm fine. That's what I discovered yesterday.

"No more blame
I am destined to keep you sane
Gotta rescue the flame
Gotta rescue the flame in your heart

No more blood
I will be there for you my love
I will stand by your side
The world has forsaken my guy

Should have seen it would be this way
Should have known from the start what he's up to
When you've loved and you've lost someone
You know what it feels like to lose"

-Adapted from The Rasmus, "Not Like the Other Girls"

This is my final stand.